The Cure

There's a longer post behind this one, but I am falling asleep while I listen to Ron and Fez so it'll have to wait.

But I wanted to tell you to go to Itunes immediately and download the new Cure Single. It's awesome. Don't believe me? Watch the Video

Little kids are AWESOME

I haven't posted in awhile because Mr. Pants and I have been super busy spending every waking moment in Lowes, where we'll blow close to $500, only to come home set up the new thing and have Al on his path of destruction knock it the fuck down.

But yesterday I decided to go over to the Game Stop and put a reserve on Mario Kart & Lego Indiana Jones for the Wii. I go in and get in line behind super mom, who is purchasing GTA vice city for her probably under 7 year old. The Game Stop Associate is being as polite as she can, telling Super Mom "this is really bad, like REALLY bad. There's cursing and killing and guns and..." Super Mom "Just ring it up, he's okay". If that kids shoots up his school, she'd be the first to say it was because of violent video games - but whatever! He's your lil' delinquent in the making.

As I am standing there waiting patiently, in walks a woman with a three year old and a baby in a car carrier. She comes in and stands between me and super mom and immediately starts yelling at the 3 year old. The little kid is cute, blonde hair, blue eyes, very chatty. She keeps telling her mom "I love you and I'd really like some popcorn". The mom keeps saying "you aren't getting any popcorn because you aren't standing right next to me". Now, I am not a fan of loud talkers in the morning and this line butting bitch was screeching at her kid. Once super mom wrapped up her transaction and headed out to buy crack for her kids, Screechy stepped up to the register, whipped out a game and did her yell / talk to the Game Stop Associate "My husband bought this and he doesn't realize that we can't be wasting our money on things like this - We have children!" Looks pointedly at the little girl, who is now shoving her hands into the baby carrier and singing "The baby doesn't want to live anymore, the baby doesn't want to live" in a rather melodic tone.

"WHAT ARE YOU SINGING?"

Little kid (With that duh! I'm singing pretty fucking clear here mommy look): "The baby doesn't want to live anymore, the baby doesn't want to live".

"WHAT DO YOU THINK THAT MEANS?"

Lil Kid: "The baby wants to die".

"WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?"

Me (out loud): "Because she's going to murder the baby".

I put the A in Anti Social

It's early. Or at least it's early for me. Mr. Pants is still snoozing, but I've already started doing laundry and had breakfast. The whole day is spread in front of me like a blank sheet of paper. I could watch Food Network and do nothing. Or I could finish Duma Key in my library. Or I could watch these 3 Netflix movies. Or I could clean my house. Unfortunately cleaning will most likely win.

We had a nice weekend. Yesterday we got up and went to breakfast. We went to a diner a town over, and the food was awesome, but the meal was very awkward. Sitting at the table next to us was my childhood best friend. I glanced over and saw her sitting there and immediately thought "That's Baby B - I should say Hi!" I figured I would wait until she was situated and then go over and say something. Except once she go her two little ones in their chairs, she picked up her cell phone and started to loudly argue with her husband. I leaned over to Mr. Pants and explained who she was. He's said "She's annoying." Suddenly she screeched "Everything always has to be all about you, Jason!" and hung up her phone. Still debating going over and saying something, I tried to mentally prepare myself. It's probably been 12 years since we saw each other and let's face it... I look like I'm wearing a fat suit now. Then she picked up her phone again and made her little daughter explain to "Daddy why he should go to New York".

That's when I decided fuck it and just kept my back to her the whole time. Back when your best friends were decided based on the proximity to your house does not necessarily transcend into adult friendships. Obviously we live two totally different lives (I honestly can not think of the last time I hung up on Mr. Pants - if I ever did) and what would I say? "Baby B? Remember me? We used to spend every waking moment together from Kindergarten to 6th grade - so how have you been since our last college drunken meeting? Really? Well, it's good to see you and be nicer to your husband!".


Is it weird that I wouldn't say anything? My brother thought I was crazy not to at least say hi. But somehow it seems okay to me.

The move is over

In the past week I have painted, cleaned, climbed ladders, hauled boxes, moved furniture alone, cursed, cried, laughed and ate my weight in pizza but it's official, we are home owners. Now if someone would just unpack all these boxes.

There are deer in the yard. And it takes me 45 minutes to get home from work but only 30 minutes to get there (why is that?).

We have no cable or internet (Hi new neighbors - you should secure your internet connection).

Bean scratched her nails to bloody lil pulps in the carrier on the way up here - she's fine now, and the plus is that she and Beej are best buddies now.

It's snowed everyday since we got here (not a lot mind you, but still SNOW!).

I don't know my new phone number.

When I drive home from work, I usually slam on the brakes when I get here because I'm always about to drive past it.

I have done no Christmas shopping and am starting to freak out.

I don't like being here alone at night with no curtains on the windows (and O&A talking about home invasions yesterday has just made me more uncomfortable).

California Tortilla is kinda gross.

I'm exhausted. So I'm off to bed - but we're here (and we're queer! We don't want anymore bears!) (which has also the ep we've been quoting since settlement -"let the bears pay the bear tax - I pay the Homer tax!" "that's the home owner tax, dad")

Night!

Who goes shopping at 4 AM?

So I'm sitting here all snuggly on the couch, catching up on DOOL, warm and happy under my heated throw, perusing the ads for "Black Friday" when I noticed that Kohls opens at 4 AM.

That's crazy talk!

Who is getting up that early to shop? What could you possibly need that would propel you out of your safe, warm bed to a store with a bunch of other lunatics? There is no deal in the universe that would get me out of bed that early.

I don't even like to get up to pee at 3 AM.

Giving the bird the bird

For as long as we've lived here (10 years!) Mr. Pants and I have spent Thanksgiving here in our PJs eating a humongous amount of food. No relatives, no arguments, no football. Just us, our cats, the parade (and me singing "I love a parade" repeatedly), the dog show and some Buffy episodes. We eat, go to bed and sleep Friday away.

TYPICALLY.

This year because we are moving on Monday the 26th - and because new job is making me work Wednesday (ALL DAY) and Friday (ALL DAY), we are cutting corners right and left.

The Turkey I lovingly brine? Is going to be a simple maple glazed turkey.

The stuffing that I bake my own bread for, cube and let get stale? Then cook up the aromatic veggies to make an awesome, delectable stuffing (I love stuffing -it's my favorite part of the meal) is being replaced by Stove Top.

The mashed sweet potato casserole with tiny lil' marshmallows on top? Is being replaced with some frozen candied sweet potatoes. (This side dish is my specialty - I used to work in a restaurant and when I first came up with it I presented it the head chef as "goo". Which stuck in the kitchen - and still to this day I call it goo.)

The pies (usually two or three) that I would labor over on Wednesday afternoon when I came home early from my old job have been replaced by a Sara Lee frozen job that was only $1.88 at the Wegmans! My dad would be so proud.

The veggies that I would marinate and roast on Thursday are off the menu too - replaced with a frozen veggie combo.

The shrimp I would normally steam in beer and old bay are gone too. Along with the Chutney spread and the beer cheese dip. Instead it'll probably be easy cheese on crackers (not really - I may throw together some apps on Wednesday night if Mr. Pants goes out drinking - maybe a fig goat cheese phyllo concoction.)

The only thing I'm keeping is the mandarin salad I would normally make.

I know I'll miss my typically Thanksgiving. Ever since my family became spread so far I've come to look forward to this easy day of great food and no stress. Even though the food won't be as good - Mr. Pants and I will still watch the parade, dog show and I didn't pack Buffy Season 2 for that reason - we'll still sit at the table and say what we're thankful for. We still feed the cats wet food and all fall into a weird slumber by 7 p.m. It stinks I'll have to get up early on Friday to go to work, but whatever... I'm off Monday and Thursday and Friday of the follow week - and by December 1st - we'll be set into our new home - I hope!

Of course last week I was bitching about XBoyfriend - he called the other day and I answered (Damn you long commute!) and he asked if he could come to our thanksgiving dinner. We had a screaming match about his drinking and then he hung up. I haven't heard from him since, but I can only imagine that he's going to show up here like nothing ever happened.

Of course I could use the help packing.

Leave me alone!

I dated a guy from the time I was 14 until 21. Not all 7 years straight through, but off and on. I can divide it up into a couple of set times - the catholic school years which involved a lot of sneaking out of the house at 3 AM, plotting how we would run off together while listening to the Cure and talking about how no one understood us. The drop out years - he dropped out of high school and my parents moved far enough away that it was hard for us to see each other. This consisted of me taking the train a lot and us fighting. The post high school years- I was half heartedly going to college, but mostly majoring in drinking - he was was well on his way to becoming a full fledged alcoholic. We split up with a whimper. One morning after a particularly booze filled evening we were sitting in Denny's, trying to decide when we would move to Vegas. He looked over at me and said "you know I'll always take care of you". Coming from a guy that I spent the better part of every night picking up after when he got bombed - I knew it wasn't true. He had cheated on me numerous times in the past and I was just so fucking sick of it and him. I told him I was going home to pack and I just never spoke to him again. To be fair he didn't really chase me down - by then we both kind of knew that it was the end of us.

We didn't talk for a long time. The internet is a dangerous thing sometimes. You can find just about anyone - even when it's not such a good idea. I sent a Christmas card. He called. We struck up an uneasy friendship.

He would call erratically, late at night - drunk and argumentative. Then the calls started coming from jail. Then rehab. Then jail. Then home. Where he'd be drunk and argumentative. Then jail. Then rehab. About 11 months ago they just stopped coming. He was in jail at the time - but he just stopped calling and writing. I didn't really mind.

Over the weekend I was talking to Violet about how I was going to purge all the letters he had ever sent me over the last 18 years. I didn't want to take that baggage with me to a new home - although I did debate (actually still going on) transcribing some of those letters on to here.

So imagine by surpise yesterday when I was getting out of the shower and I heard this on the machine I kinda freaked:
"I know you don't want to talk to me." [Correctamundo]. "I have to apologize to you for how I treated you in the past." [No you don't]. "I can't believe how I let myself get wrapped up with her [his crazy baby mama] again". See up until that sentence I thought maybe he was working his way up the steps and felt like he needed to actually apologize... Not that he wanted to bitch about his girlfriend. So I went back in to dry my hair. And in the 15 minutes it took me to do that he called 4 times and left more rambling messages including an odd "I'm coming to visit you in 2 weeks [no you're not].

I drove up to deliver my nephew's birthday gift and came home to a bunch of hang ups on the machine from his number.

So now I question - do I engage or not? I'm thinking he's drinking again - and I really don't have anything to say to him. Everything has been going so well - the job, the house, etc... I just don't want to deal with craziness right now.